:(

Oi, what shitty results. We had to wash and hang dry my bandages, so I wasn't wrapped over night. My calf was up 7 cms, which caused my 4 year old wound to have fluid pool and eventually drain out of it. My foot, ankle, and thigh were okay.

The fluid worries me. This could mean my wound is tunneling again and I would need debridement surgery. Debridement is so painful and the hole it creates is frightening. With my last debridement I could comfortably fit a baseball into the hole. I don't know how they could wrap me with a wound that large.

I'm also feeling really guilty about my mom. I think I make her come across as not caring about this whole process. It is the exact opposite. I don't know what to do. When I get in that room, I feel so much pressure to be positive and to be responsible for myself that I make it look like my mom is the fault of my regressions.* She's going to my appointment on Wednesday and I'm afraid of what they are going to say to her. I don't want them to make her feel bad because she doesn't need help feeling guilty about my legs.

No appointment tomorrow, Thursday, or Friday because my Grandma is returning to Texas to get some of her things. Wednesday's appointment is for 8 AM. That's right. 8. Fucking. AM.

All in all, I am not looking forward to Wednesday.





*Thanks, Robo. I hope I used that right.